I get so tired of the world we live in, and just feel like going back to the Ocean. I just want to float in the middle of no where, be with the wind, sun, Ocean and the fish a birds. Watch the sun set and rice and not worry about anything!!!
I grew up with a father that did not stop comparing us with other. I think it was his way to try to get us to work harder...He constantly criticised, well the French are pretty good at that!
There are a lot of all that upbring that I dont agree with...yet I must confess I get stuck in it all!
Its not an easy task breaking free from a pattern that was done for so many years...So every now and then, I start to think that my life sucks, and I look around and think that every one seems so happy, that they are all doing such wonderful things!!!
Its wrong...But I will confess that as a society we also do it to each other..."Oh, how often do you get to surf?"-"I go everyday"....Yeah, well thats great!!! Or I get frustrated with those who boast about the fact that their kids dont go to day care...Sure, I would do that too...If I had someone to help me once in a while!!!! Dont judge me, when you dont even know that I dont have any family or even 1 friend I can call on if needed!!! I am frustrated at how our body's get looked at, as if we are never skinny enough, or good looking or what size bra we wear, if any!!! (my boobs are so so small, I dont need a bra, there is nothing to support)...Where is Tullula? "at day care" -No she is not punished, its not a punishment to go to day care. I have to work and unfortunately she cant come with me, not do i have a best friend that can take care of her!
And yes I only live in a little unit, and no Im not a social case! I just dont have the means to buy a house, let alone rent one! Why, do we get put into boxes??? I feel like no matter what I do, its never good enough!
I really get sick of it all.
It makes me grumpy.
It makes me depressed.
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